title at the bottom.

a gut
that needs to be
exterminated.
'biggest problem
in the world '
(biggest my gut has ever been).

small guts
beg
for food,
and mine
does too.
more.
don't eat when you're
not hungry
because there are
so many
who are.

so i begin to run.
losing the gut,
after losing my mind,
while losing time,
that i could be
using
to try and fix
this shit hole
i'm running on.


* " this was written as fiction and dedicated to nobody"

misery loves resolutions, too.

miserable over nothing
except being miserable,
i scare him away
and the camera drops,
leaving me
alone.

i get ready for bed,
contemplate counting the blackheads
on my nose,
but haven't the
patience
to.

walking back to my room,
silence ceases to exist;
the crowds are laughing
while a home
breaks
apart.

friday night.

whining along
(after an intake of wine),
trying to give meaning
to the meaningless lyrics
you don't understand
(or really know).

one night friends,
one night stands.

one trick phoney.

!!!

the enormous amount of
exclamation marks
exclaim
what era she was born in.

as i put my face on.

maybe she's born with it.
no,
it's the makeup.
what once liberated
now enslaves.

indecision on the eve of a food shortage.

cucumbers and tomatoes.
am i having chips?
no, potatoes.

okay, i'll have them.

can i have them tomorrow?

i don't want your autopilot.

I've discovered that people don't take enough
time out of their lives
to think about what they like-
the ideas, people, places, flowers, books, colours, anything.

As an icebreaker I used to ask,
"What do you like?"
I realized it put people on the spot,
but there was no pressure to answer quickly.
(Everything else moves quickly, conversation shouldn't follow suit).

I didn't want to know about their job or if they went to school,
it's easy not to like either though you
engage
in them,
and asking in specifics narrowed the path
with which I gave the person
for their answer.

I wanted to hear it all.

After asking,
I had always received unsure glances,
questioning whether I was crazy,
or too drunk to ask something
'better'.
I'd repeat the question and get a shrug,
or funny glance
and then the conversation would move onto
alcohol or drugs or bands or inside jokes I didn't understand or how they needed to go out for a smoke or where the washroom was or sip, sip, slurp of their glass or often,
no more conversation at all.
Just a turn of the head,
from my direction
to any other one
that wouldn't ask them to do so much
self reflecting.



* google icebreaker and the top 5 results will be anything but.

the first hurrah.

hurrah.

a place to stash
away
the thoughts
of a
fool.

street art,
no art,
poetry,
trash,
life.

(all are one and the same)

my personal disposal dump.

enjoy.

"Sometimes you just have to pee in the sink."